Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Why Crank was Great!

This scene sums up why I loved the movie "Crank".

caution, mature subject matter and language!

Hardcore Sh*t made from Plant Sh*T!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99T1af4po00

Awesome movie!

R$

ryanswitzer@hotmail.com

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Movie Reviews

I watched Music and Lyris on Friday night. A romantic comedy starring Hugh Grant, Drew Barrymore, the tall guy from Everybody Loves Raymond and the tall girl from 3rd Rock From the Sun.

A nice little romantic comedy. Hugh Grant is at his "charmingly befuddled" best. He's even upped his game from Notting Hill and Love Actually. He plays a guy who was a huge music star in the 80's as part of a duo called 'Pop'. Basically his partner in Pop went on to a huge solo career while Andrew Fletcher (Grant) hit the rock of obscurity and now plays state fairs and High School reunions. It's the story of Wham! put to a movie.

The washed up Fletcher is called into duty to write a song for "Cora" (played by Haley Bennett who has never been in a major motion picture, but will be in more!). Cora is basically a Britney/Xtina-esque popstar who is HUGE is the music industry and wants Fletcher to write a song for her. She unrealistically wants it in six days.

Hugh Grant is forced to write a song under pressure and after a failed attempt at working with a lyricist, he finds that the girl who waters his plants (Barrymore) is providing him with the inspiration he needs. A love story ensues.

When a Hugh Grant movie works it's usually because of a good cast around Hugh. Love Actually was loaded with A-list stars. Notting Hill had a great Julia Roberts performance with Rhys Ifans doing a great job in the supporting role of the wacky roommate. In Music and Lyrics Drew Barrymore is not at her most charming and Brad Garret (Everybody Loves Raymond) should be the guy to steal the show but his role gave him nothing to work with. Kristen Johnson (3rd Rock) plays the older sister to Drew Barrymore and is a gem, but isn't given much screen time. Basically Hugh Grant made this movie good. Am I a little gay for saying that? Maybe.


Not the most memorable movie of the year, but there are alot worse ways to spend a Friday night.

Saturday night I needed something with a little more testosterone so I turned to the movie Crank. The star of this movie is Jason Statham. His first ntoable roles where in Guy Ritchie's Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrells and Snatch. He hit the mainstream as the star of The Transporter movies. While the 80's and 90's where full of actions stars like Arnie, Stallone, Van Damme and Segal, guys like Statham, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and Vin Diesel seem to be the go to guys for action this century. Statham gives another solid action performance in Crank. The jist of it is, Statham wants to quit his life as a hired killer to settle down with his hot girlfriend (played by Amy Smart). The mob, rather than let him go, inject him with a mysterious drug that will cause him to die unless he keeps his heart rate up. It's like Speed but instead of a bus blowing up, it's a person. Statham's character, named Chev Chelios, finds all sorts of ways to stay alive long enough to exact revenge on those responsible for his predicament. Without spoiling it for you, he robs a store of all it's Red Bull, takes all sorts of drugs and even has a very public display of affection while all of Chinatown watches (best scene in the movie!).

If you want a good movie to watch with the boys, it doesn't get much better than Crank. The discussions you and your buddies would have about how to stay alive in his situation would make great conversation.

I'll do a Shrek 3 review soon. Hope the long weekend was well.

R$

ryanswitzer@hotmail.com

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

The Best Team Ever...

It must've been the way the WHL championship game was devalued by the media as a mere set up for the mem cup that really got me thinking about winning the WHL and winning the Memorial Cup. I've never watched much junior hockey outside of the WHL so anyone down east can feel free to argue, but I firmly believe the GREATEST JUNIOR HOCKEY TEAM EVER DID NOT WIN THE MEM CUP. People who know me know I'm about to rant on one of favorite subjects. The amazing 1992-93 Swift Current Broncos. Best junior team ever!

The year started out as promising. Todd Holt, Rick Girard and Jason Krywulak leading the way offensively with returning players Keith McCambridge and Brent Bilodeau holding down the blue line while local boy Trent McCleary, fresh of an Ottawa training camp, wore the "C". Euro netminder Milan Hnilicka was picked up in a preseason deal with Brandon. Tyler Wright and Andy Schneider were playing pro at age 19 and 20 respectively for the Edmonton oilers and New Haven Senators respectively. It was when the two players just mentioned were returned to Swift Current that things got good. The team then made a flurry of deadline day trades and suddenly had a roster to die for. Come playoff time the Broncos were tops in the league standings with:

3 NHL 1st round draft picks:
Tyler Wright
Dean McAmmond
Brent Bilodeau

3 100 point men
Jason Krywulak (161)
Rick Girard (141)
Todd Holt (113)
(it should also be noted that Tyler Wright and Andy Schneider played under 40 games, Schneider had 85 points in 38 games, a pace that would've exceeded 170 points for a full year!!! Wright had 65 in 37 games, on pace for more than 140! Dean McAmmond only played 48 games and had 78 points, also could've broke 100 in a full 72 game sched.)

What about toughness?

Bill Hooson
Keith McCambridge
Darren Perkins
RYAN BROWN!!! (so tough he didn't have to fight)
Jason Horvath
Brent Bilodeau
Trent McCleary
Darren McLean

McCambridge, Hooson, Perkins, Brown and Bilodeau could all argubaly be considered heavyweights (Brown, Bilodeau and McCambridge beyond a doubt). McCleary, McLean and Horvath were all SOLID middleweights.

Everyone on the team was either a goal scorer or a bruiser along the boards and with the gloves off. I remember being the stick boy and hearing Tyler Wright just after the McAmmond deal. "I played four months in the NHL to come back to Swift Current to be a fourth line center!"

3rd line actually.

I made myself memorize the three line combos.

Krywulak, Schneider, McCleary
Holt, Girard, McLean
McAmmond, Wright, Buckberger (nice 3rd line!!!)

The team won the WHL title. Portland made them sweat in the league final, but they won on home ice. Sadly the Mem Cup would not be a good week. Hnilicka, who was hot and cold all year didn't have a great tournament. In Bronco history we certainly remember Dec. 30 1986, and we fondly remember the 89 team. What Swift Current had in 1993 was just ridiculous in terms of talent and ability. Sure they didn't bring the national title home, but should be remembered just the same as the 89 team. While the 89 team had local boys like Tim Tisdale and the Krugers and it's share of great players, the 93 team was just plain stacked with talent.

As an even more insane sidenote. Had the Broncos not traded Kimbi Daniels and had Geoff Sanderson not gone pro, they could have been on the team as 20 year olds. Imagine the dilemma of narrowing the roster to three 20s with;

Jason Krywulak (who still holds the single season record for goals and points)
Andy Schneider (Who would hold the record for points had he played a full year)
Trent McCleary (future NHLer and captain at the time)
Kimbi Daniels (many say it was only the attitude that kept him from being an NHL first rounder)
Geoff Sanderson (who would've played in Swift if he wasn't scoring 46 goals in the NHL that year!)

The best junior team ever. If there was ever a better one, prove me wrong. I don't think you can.

R$

ryanswitzer@hotmail.com
The Boring Internet...

Come on Switzer where is the blog update.
Are you getting lazy on me? You didn't get suckered in by Keen and are dedicating yourself to Facebook??
Don't let him influence you man....look away from the light....look away from the light!!!


Compliments of Regan Bartel who was nice enough to visit and read my blog after I took an un-necessary run at him a few weeks ago. Don't bother looking for it, I saw the error of my ways and it's been nuked. Always blog responsibly and not when you're in a bad mood. Keep your words soft and sweet cause someday you may hae to eat them.

No, I'm not hooked on Facebook. I was for a weekend and now I'm bored of it. Maybe I'm just getting too old for stuff like that. Maybe I prefer to go for drinks/have supper with/go for a night out with/actually place a telephone call to people I haven't seen in awhile rather than "write on their wall".

What have I done in the last few weeks? Spiderman 3 was very average. Once a superhero or science fiction gets three films into the series the creativity gets a little loose and dumb things happen. See Superman 3, Batman and Robin and now this. "Emo Spiderman?" Peter Parker showing what a badass the black suit has made him buy dancing in front of girls like he's in a high school musical. To quote the New Goblin "You knew you had this coming Pete". Spiderman 4 will either totally sink to new depths or up everyone's game after the schlock that was the third.

Notice how the Star Wars prequels started cheesy, then got better? Episode One was annoying aliens and hippie jedis with bad hair. By Episode Three; powerful images of Anakin burned alive and emotional scenes with "younglings". George Lucas did six Star Wars movies and only ONE really sucked. The moral of the story is George Lucs is god. While he may not have an Oscar he is THE MAN in Hollywood.

Heather is having friends over tonite to watch America's Next Top Model or some shit like that. My son is in need of help for a project so I'm out for now. As Heather's friends descend upon my living room, I will make my way down to comment on the WHL final/Mem Cup later on. I'll add it to the end of this post. Half of you are here for the hockey so check back in a few hours.

Update!!!

What a series between Med Hat and Vancouver for the WHL title. Jon Keen invited me to game seven and I wish I would've accepted. Sadly I was forced to watch the feed on the WHL website. Other broadcasters have heralded the job by the Shaw crew of Russell and Wilms. I thought Russell called a good game but this Wilms was clueless. A good play by play and color team can really sell a game and tell a moving story of what is happening on the ice. Pierre McGuire does this real well. Foster Hewitt was immortalized during the 72 Canada/Russia series. Danny Gallivan made half the nation care about the Habs. I'll even give props to Regan for making the Broncos larger than life on the radio and Jon Keen has made some 2-1 snooze fests sound much more compelling then they were. Bill Wilms contributed to the league losing interest in the battle for the most competitive trophy in junior hockey. Asinine statements like "They should just call them co-champions and send them straight to the mem cup".

Spoken like someone who has never played a competitive sport.

The WHL Championship is the culmination of a 72 game schedule that takes 21 teams from Brandon, Manitoba to Portland, Oregon on a bus from September to March. Bag skate practises, leaving home at a young age often for places hundreds (even thousands) of miles away. Kids from Manitoba are playing in Seattle! How often do you think they see their family? A WHL Championship is a BIG DEAL. Game seven was hyped merely as "who gets into the mem cup through the front door?"

That's hogwash. The emotion between the two teams was hardly touched on the broadcast. A seven game series that culminated in double overtime and the color guy seems surprised the Tigers weren't resting Kris Russell and Darren Helm and starting Ryan Holfeld in net. As Regan Bartel pointed out, the Vancouver paper didn't give it ANY ink at all.

It makes me think of the often under appreciated 1993 Swift Current Broncos. A team that won a league title yet is sadly remembered for having a bad week at the Mem Cup. A mem cup is a big tasty cherry on an often under appreciated sundae.

Congrats to the Tigers. WHL champs and as a bonus users of the front door to the mem cup.


R$

ryanswitzer@hotmail.com

Monday, May 14, 2007

Happy Belated Mother's Day.

This sent to me by CKSW Jock-star/Ping Pong Ninja Kurtis Bakanec.


Hey Ryan! Kurtis here. I came across this jewel o' fromage during my Internet travels. It stars everyone's favorite Mohawked, gold-chain-wearing, enforcer-type--Mr. T. Enjoy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo

Cheers!

KB

R$

ryanswitzer@hotmail.com

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Happy Mom's Day.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWJTKc2-SWU

The song says it better than I could.

R$

ryanswitzer@hotmail.com

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Back for a quickie...

Talk of the WHL finals is the bait and switch the Medicine Hat Tigers pulled on the Vancouver Giants in game two of the WHL playoffs. Rod Pedersen tells the story better than I could (credit rodpedersen.com)

The Tigers beat Vancouver 3-2 in OT last night to grab a 2-1 lead in the WHL final. BOOOO on the Tigers! I've watched and read the events of Game 2 where Tiger coach Willy Desjardins got Derek Dorsett to goad Van's Kendall McArdle into a fight, then have meathead Jordan Bendfeld jump up and take on McArdle rather than Dorsett. Don Hay of the Giants says the Tigers should be embarrassed but Willie makes no apologies and says he coaches to win. I would have expected more out of Willie Desjardins. The WHL should've stepped in with some discipline for goon tactics like that

Here is the youtube footage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLEtjUlbc3M

I love it! This is why Willie Desjardins is one of the best. In a series where I was totally indifferent, I'm now proudly waving my Tigers foam finger. I've met Derek Dorsett a few times. He is one of the few players in the WHL who will be talked about and remembered ten years from now. He gets in the oppostion's head better than anyone I've ever seen. Vancouver got outsmarted, plain and simple. The evidence was all over the ice and McArdle and Vancouver coaches didn't see it.

1. Dorsett is the league's best agitator.

2. Dorsett is recovering from a broken hand is is NOT going to risk injuring it in the league final.

3. Bendfeld does NOT usually pair up with Kris Russell on the right side.

Coaches, broadcasters and media are peeing all over the Tigers for this move. I love it! Look at the evidence and no flags were raised in Vancouver'e head. The starting lineups are submitted almost TWO hours before the game! Vancouver had ample time to prepare. If this is what Tigers hockey is all about then I'm ready to move to Medicine Hat and be put on the waiting list for season tickets. Hockey is more than two teams chasing a black disc trying to put it passed a goalie. Well played Willie! Well played!

Listen to the whiny Vancouver homer color guy too. Priceless.

R$
Back for a quickie...

Talk of the WHL finals is the bait and switch the Medicine Hat Tigers pulled on the Vancouver Giants in game two of the WHL playoffs. Rod Pedersen tells the story better than I could (credit rodpedersen.com)

The Tigers beat Vancouver 3-2 in OT last night to grab a 2-1 lead in the WHL final. BOOOO on the Tigers! I've watched and read the events of Game 2 where Tiger coach Willy Desjardins got Derek Dorsett to goad Van's Kendall McArdle into a fight, then have meathead Jordan Bendfeld jump up and take on McArdle rather than Dorsett. Don Hay of the Giants says the Tigers should be embarrassed but Willie makes no apologies and says he coaches to win. I would have expected more out of Willie Desjardins. The WHL should've stepped in with some discipline for goon tactics like that

Here is the youtube footage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLEtjUlbc3M

I love it! This is why Willie Desjardins is one of the best. In a series where I was totally indifferent, I'm now proudly waving my Tigers foam finger. I've met Derek Dorsett a few times. He is one of the few players in the WHL who will be talked about and remembered ten years from now. He gets in the oppostion's head better than anyone I've ever seen. Coaches, broadcasters and media are peeing all over the Tigers for this move. I love it! If this is what Tigers hockey is all about then I'm ready to move to Medicine Hat and be put on the waiting list for season tickets.

R$